Not Writing
Seriously, what in the hell is that about? I wrote like two lines of copy for an ad at work about a month ago and the Moon has gone around the Earth more than eleven times since I put anything into the blogmotron. Fuck that.
Zombieblowfish's Psycho Alphabet
I've enjoyed working on this project so much and I hope we end up printing these up somehow. It's great to have a fun art series to work on with some real bad ass people. Here are mine, and when the new ones go up they're listed over here! The only thing that lost it a star is that it got a little off-format and out of hand due to the unexpected amount of people who wanted to contribute.
God Cancelling the Michigan Atheists Meeting
He probably knew we were going to bitch about him and eat Chinese food for four hours. Now it's not until the 23rd. But come on, this was a hilarious day to get a foot of snow.
The "Worst" Ringtone In The World
ring_tone.mp3
I think I could run that puppy through Acid for a few minutes and get it to sound a lot worse, but I still went ahead and put it on my phone.
Seizure Salad
A delicious mix of leafy greens served in a special bowl. The bowl is built with a flashing strobe light pointing up from the bottom which produces an intriguing mystery effect while the salad still lays over it, but will mercilessly assault your eyes if you dare to lift that last piece of lettuce. Parmesan and MDMA croutons cost extra. Yes, I do have the patent on this.
Every Episode of TDS Online for Free
On one hand, who in the world is going to sit through a 10 to 30 second commercial for every two to three minutes of show? On the other hand, me.
Work
No matter how much of your life you feel like you're wasting by doing your job, the piteous, lonely dollars in your bank account will always be there to remind you that you're not wasting enough. One star for being the reason I can buy beer.
Amateis' Birthday Party
There's a little I don't remember, but I know:
- Paul was bioluminescent or something
- I played at least two games of Othello and Adam is good
- Jeff brought some nice beverage which he made himself
- there were at least two arguments about astronomy
- Steve said he was going to make a horror movie about hamburgers
- nobody stole anything
- nobody called Homeland Security on us
Officially Turning X-mas Back Into Saturnalia
This would essentially mean that you could mouth off to your boss for a whole week while you're drunk at work and they wouldn't be able to tell you what to do or fire you. There would also be a lot less Santa and Jesus stuff flying around. Minus one star for almost guaranteeing everyone will barf up wine at least once every day for seven days in a row.
Whatever Blogger Did to Their Interface
I don't get it. It looks the same but sucks more? The thing crashed my browser three times today and takes up more memory than Crysis.
*Vehicle-security-star-rating-system stars from Google image search or some shit.
ring_tone.mp3
I think I could run that puppy through Acid for a few minutes and get it to sound a lot worse, but I still went ahead and put it on my phone.
Seizure Salad
A delicious mix of leafy greens served in a special bowl. The bowl is built with a flashing strobe light pointing up from the bottom which produces an intriguing mystery effect while the salad still lays over it, but will mercilessly assault your eyes if you dare to lift that last piece of lettuce. Parmesan and MDMA croutons cost extra. Yes, I do have the patent on this.
Every Episode of TDS Online for Free
On one hand, who in the world is going to sit through a 10 to 30 second commercial for every two to three minutes of show? On the other hand, me.
Work
No matter how much of your life you feel like you're wasting by doing your job, the piteous, lonely dollars in your bank account will always be there to remind you that you're not wasting enough. One star for being the reason I can buy beer.
Amateis' Birthday Party
There's a little I don't remember, but I know:
- Paul was bioluminescent or something
- I played at least two games of Othello and Adam is good
- Jeff brought some nice beverage which he made himself
- there were at least two arguments about astronomy
- Steve said he was going to make a horror movie about hamburgers
- nobody stole anything
- nobody called Homeland Security on us
Officially Turning X-mas Back Into Saturnalia
This would essentially mean that you could mouth off to your boss for a whole week while you're drunk at work and they wouldn't be able to tell you what to do or fire you. There would also be a lot less Santa and Jesus stuff flying around. Minus one star for almost guaranteeing everyone will barf up wine at least once every day for seven days in a row.
Whatever Blogger Did to Their Interface
I don't get it. It looks the same but sucks more? The thing crashed my browser three times today and takes up more memory than Crysis.
*Vehicle-security-star-rating-system stars from Google image search or some shit.
2 comments:
I don't know what a Hemato 100 is, but if it's anything like Virginia Slim Menthol 100s, I want no part of it.
It's more like Marlboro Nuclear 100s For Men.
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